Oh, hi. You look nice today. Did you change your hair?
What's that? I don't look nice? I look like someone ran over me with a steamroller, then packed all of their spare socks in the bags beneath my eyes?
Well, true. Not nice of you to say, but true.
So last week was my birthday. (HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, there, I said it, you don't have to! Aren't I nice for letting you off the hook.) Aside from most of my family being sick it was a perfectly lovely week. Never let it be said that I don't know how to celebrate, because this year I really went wild and spent the bulk of the week editing! I know. You wish I had invited you, don't you?
But it wasn't all editing madness. There were trolls:
Courtesy of Ellen in Sweden, who runs Paranormalcy.net and is the sweetest thing ever. The troll looks exactly how I imagined the trolls in Supernaturally! Also CANDY. My kids kept asking when I was going to open the chocolate. I kept saying NEVER. It wasn't for them.
There was also evidence of what happens when your adorable children can shop for you in the children's section of stores:
BUT. BUT. IT CHANGES COLOR IN THE SUN. You are jealous.
You know you are.
And finally, from my ridiculously awesome dad, what do you get the girl who has everything (or at least has enough and will never give you any ideas on what to get her for gifts because really she doesn't need anything else [how could she when she has a color-changing Snoopy shirt??])? Why, you find her a pink stun gun and bedazzle the case, of course.
THAT'S RIGHT, VAMPIRES. I AM ARMED.
(Also, yes, I checked California law and it IS legal for me to own a stun gun. Also the picture is mirror-image, so that's an E on the case. Also maybe I feel a little bit like Veronica Mars and I think I need to go do some private investigating and maybe solve some crimes. Also yes it's put in a super high cupboard where my kids can't reach it. Heck, I can't even reach it...)
There was also a bookstore date with one of my best friends (that was supposed to be for me to pick out a book but turned into me recommending half of the YA section to her), a home-made pizza party (that turned into a Nerf gun war and made me realize I don't have nearly enough foam-dart violence in my life), and finishing my first round of edits on Isadora.
So, you'll have to excuse the lack of blogging because my brain has been knee-deep in revisions. (What, your brain doesn't have knees? THEN HOW DOES IT WALK AROUND WHEN IT WANTS TO GET A BREATH OF FRESH AIR AFTER YOU'VE FALLEN ASLEEP? That's what I thought. I just hate it when my brain forgets to wash its feet before climbing back in through my ears.)
To make it up for you I have a book recommendation: CHIME, by Franny Billingsley. Loved the voice, loved the writing, loved the story. A haunting and fascinating look at family loyalty, guilt, memories, and forgiveness. With bonus bog monsters. Thanks to Gayle Forman for the recommendation! (Pretty much I go to the bookstore now and think, "What has Gayle said to read?" The same applies to Holly Black.)