Thursday, May 24, 2012

TWO MONTHS!

UPDATE: THE CONTEST IS CLOSED.

Two months! Two months! Just two months until ENDLESSLY comes out! Here, have some pretty:


The other day my son sighed and said, "Mom, sometimes I imagine things we're going to do, and they are really fun and awesome. But then when we do them, they aren't as fun as I imagined."

Which, oh sweetheart, I'm sorry you've already discovered this very serious bummer of a fact of life.

But it reminds me of a quote from SUPERNATURALLY, after Evie is devastated to learn that unicorns didn't match up to her Lisa Frank daydreams:

"Faeries didn’t have wings and bordered on evil, pixies were dirty, feral, and tended to bite, and mermaids had neither glorious hair nor seashell bras. Now this about unicorns. Sometimes reality sucked."

I'll admit that, while I went ahead and threw a dragon into ENDLESSLY because really, why not, there is a scene with a unicorn that is probably my favorite. It's Hot Stuff's favorite scene from everything I've ever written. I'm not going to say anything else about it. Okay, fine: RAINBOWS.

I'm so excited for you to read this book!

So! A CONTEST for my last ARC! I want you to tell me how a supernatural creature would disappoint you in reality. I also want you to tell twitter or facebook or your blog. Here are some examples (though you should come up with your own--it's FUN) (yes, this is my idea of fun) (yes, my kids' birthday parties suck):

Finally got a werewolf boyfriend, but he's so skinny he doesn't even rip out of his shirt when he shifts. Lame.

Met a super hot guy in science class who looked like he wanted to kill me. Turns out more Dexter than Edward. Typical.

Dating a fallen angel would be way easier if I didn't have that stupid down allergy. Hives? Not so romantic.

I went to Disneyland and met a pixie, and all I got were these vicious bite and claw marks.


You get the picture. Sadly, in Evie's world, not even fantasy lives up to fantasies.

So, RULES:

1. Tell me in the comments how a supernatural creature encounter would be light on the "super" part.
2. Post your cleverness on your blog, twitter, tumblr, facebook, or, if you have none of those, CONGRATULATIONS YOU WILL SURVIVE THE COMING INTERNET APOCALYPSE UNSCATHED! Ahem. You can, I dunno, write it on your hand in sharpie. No links necessary. Though if you do sharpie it on your hand, that's awesome, send me a picture.
3. Sacrifice a calculator on the altar of the Random Number Generator Deities and hope you win!

Further clarifications:
International entries are A-OKAY. If you don't leave your email address, please don't panic and come back and apologize and leave it. I'll find you (she says, smiling creepily). One entry per person. Cleverness gets you good karma, but doesn't affect the randomly drawn winner. Pre-ordering also gets you good karma. Just in case you were wondering.

DEADLINE: Tuesday, May 29th, 11:59 PM My Time. Or just by the time I wake up on Wednesday and get around to picking a winner.

And now I must gallop off into the sunset on the back of my unicorn. Except it's more of a plodding shuffle than a gallop. And it can't carry much weight, so I'm actually walking next to it. Plugging my nose. But you get the idea.

UPDATE: THE CONTEST IS CLOSED.

111 comments:

Laura W. said...

FINALLY got my Hogwarts invitation. Turns out the castle doesn't have wireless.

Isaiah Campbell said...

Found a magic lamp. Rubbed the crap out of it till the genie showed up. Turns out, he doesn't GRANT wishes, he just WISHES. "Gawd, I wish you'd clean up around here." "I wish you'd shave." "I wish you'd make a little more money." Stupid freaking genie.

Kiersten White said...

Two for two on LAUGH OUT LOUDS. Man alive I love my readers...

Sophia Richardson said...

Anyone reminded of Mulan (dragon, not lizard!)? Anyone? *crickets*

Speaking of... Finally achieved my life dream of owning a pet dragon. The fire in its belly? Yeah, turns out they just have crappy digestive systems. He makes my mortal enemies cower for all the wrong reasons.

Aubrey said...

I met this gorgeous guy who never wears a shirt which is a plus. Then I learned he's actually a stinky dog that isn't house broken and likes to mark his territory...including me. Not so romantic.

PamM said...

Finally found my dream vampire guy. To bad it turns out he sucks at everything he does and not just blood.

Kydirtgirl68 AT gmail DOT com

Kirsti said...

Went sailing on an emerald sea and met a siren. Turns out the sounds from a cop car are her greatest hits.

TLT said...

Met a smokin hot vampire but when he opened hissing to reveal his fangs they were yellowed and riddled with cavities. As he went in for the bit with his halitosis breath, one broke off and he sulked away whining. I gave him two aspirin and sadly remain mortal.

RuthiK said...

I met my fairy godmother today and found out that she has been on hiatus all these years...well, that explains the braces and the frizzy hair....such a slacker.

loudmouth said...

Finally got myself a genie but he's so stingy he won't give me all of my three wishes. How is one wish enough? He's not even anywhere near as cheerful as the one from Aladin.

Laura W. said...

I know my Hogwarts one didn't exactly follow the rules of "creature" fantasy, but it was the best thing I could think of. :) Plus, there are plenty of magical creatures at Hogwarts, right?

yabooknerd said...

I finally met a dragon - too bad he kidnapped me and hoards all books. Now I have nothing to read. I'm so bored....

mrdarcy3 @ yahoo .com

Jen said...

Finally found the love of my life, he's a little pale but that's okay. We go to prance through a sunny field and next thing I know he burst into flames and disappears. Stinkin vampires

Anonymous said...

Got chased by a zombie on the way to work. When she finally cornered me and I prepared to have my brains devoured the zombie asked in a pleasant Bristish accent "Excuse me, do you have any Grey Poupon?".
a_ramsey4444(at)hotmail.com

Jessy said...

I met a sparkly man and fell in love. Too bad I never once stopped to think of why his eyes were bright red...

Debbie Barr said...

Turns out real trolls do NOT have brightly colored hair OR gemstones in their belly button. They are unfortunately naked though... #DollsLie

Jennifer said...

I would love to date a hunky werewolf except I am not that fond of big dogs. Oops!

jlkalman26 at gmail dot com
@jlkalman26

Ava said...

Every little girl wants a pony, right? Well, I wanted a griffin. So on my 8th birthday my ma and pop gifted me one of the majestic creatures. He was huge. I named him Hans. His talons were the size of my head. Everything was grand...until he screeched. Good God, the whole neighborhood's ears were ringing for a week! As it turns out, yeah, Griffins...not a great family pet. We have a dog now, a pug named Gretel. The only problem is, well, she's worse than Hans. I think she's a demon. No. Seriously. Send help...please?

Thank you, Kiersten!
- Ava
ava wlassak (at) gmail (dot) com

alicia marie said...

Met a great guy through a dating site. I finally agreed to meet up with him for a date and come to find out he's a pixie who wasn't completely honest on his profile. Under his profile picture it should have said "true to size."

midnightblooms said...

My fairy godmother made my bleeping glass slippers two sizes too small! We are talking MAJOR blisters. I finally got one of those suckers off and "Prince Charming" comes along and shoves it back on my foot.

Ashley said...

My dream date finally picks up, and what is his mode of transportation? A bleeping dragon. This dress was not made for a dragon.

destiny said...

Met a really good looking guy, turns out he's a shape shifter. I asked him to turn into something for me, he informed me that he could turn into any food item I wanted. I requested him to be a slice of chocolate cheesecake, which he granted. It looked so good and real, I couldn't keep myself from taking a bite. As soon as I did he shifted back into a human and his right arm was missing! Oops!

melissa @ 1lbr said...

Dating a vampire isn't exactly as good as I thought. If the bloody breath wasn't enough, turns out the teeth? Not retractable. Worse than kissing with braces.

Samantha Jean said...

After professing his undying love for me and asking me to go with him to Atlantica, the merman of my dreams turned to me while introducing me to his family and says, "Um, who are you again?" Turns out, Mermen are part goldfish.

Katie Savidge said...

I Fell in love with a zombie he said he could literally just eat me up and I thought that was so cute. The not so cute part was waking up with no legs (zombie fail)

Aspiring Something said...

I was super excited when my leprechaun arrived in the mail. You know pot'o'gold, rainbows and all that. Turns out Leprechauns have a drug habit, and mine sniffed all his gold and then proceeded to steal mine.

Daisy said...

I got a dragon! And seriously, stop calling it a lizard already!! Just because it's only 3 inches tall and loves to hide behind it's teddy bear more than it does breathing fire, doesn't mean it's not a dragon. Seriously.

daisyjdebruin(at)gmail(dot)com

Lisaa said...

I'm walking along on a beach when I see this beautiful guy with a fin-tail thinggie!! When I look closer the merman seems to be in trouble... Ahhh someone's attacking a sexy merman!! So I run out into the water toward him to save him from his imminent death... turns out he's drowning in foot high water...

Krystal Maestas said...

So after years of searching, I finally found an elf village! Instead of tall, blond, archery masters, it turns out that all they do is make shoes.

krystal_maestas@yahoo.com

Gossamer Akiana said...

So I finally find a peguses. Think it has wings? Hah! Wrong. It went PEGGING after my SISTER the second it saw her. . .or sniffed her. . .or whatever it is they do. Great Sky Spirits, I am so sick of all these LUSTY paranormals! But I should've thought about the name more. . .

Jessica@a GREAT read said...

I met a vampire.

Sadly he sucks--blood and just plain sucks. He stinks, literally, he's been (un)dead for 200 years. And he's paler than my pale Irish white skin. And he's a history fanatic, go figure!

Not quite the romantic being of the paranormal world I was hoping for.

Emily said...

Met a unicorn in the woods one day. I tried to say hi and pet him, but he poked me with his horn and ran away instead. It hurt!

Thanks!!

erexatmidnight (at) gmail (dot) com

Makayla said...

So I finally got a vampire boyfriend, but he won't even come to my house because my mom hoards garlic like the freaking vampire apocalypse is coming. So none of the sneaking through my bedroom window and being all cute Twilight-ey stuff.

~Makayla

(PS: I did write it on my hand with a Sharpie, and now I will dig around and try to find your email address so you can see my awesome tattoo)

Gjertrud said...

Having a sphinx to guard my house was a lot cooler before I realized he would question me too.

Inky said...

I finally the the baby mermaid I always wanted. So cute, but not really. I put her in the Mermaid Tank and she splashed me! Big Time. I thought I was getting a tame one!! Apparently not because now I look like I've wet myself. ALL OVER.

Inky said...

PS. If you're interested see blog post here: http://bookhavenextraordinaire.blogspot.com/2012/05/supernatural-encounter-gone-wack-o.html

hannahsue10[at]gmail[dot]com

Amanda Morganne said...

Got to meet a phoenix today and it died…no literally, it died. No resurrection…sad face.

Thanks for the giveaway!

rednails14 (at) hotmail (dot) come

Anonymous said...

met a nice girl in third period.Well turns off she's a half-fairy which comes with ability to read minds as long as their thinking about higeine and truthfulness.No not like "oh I don't lie but can omit"but like"hey who's that guy with blond hair who's your boyfriend because he hasn't brushed his teeth for a week" seriously...annoying and gross

Lacie J. Archer said...

So I've got me a smoking hot boyfriend...no seriously, he's hotter than your boyfriend...turns out he a demon from he-double hockey sticks and every time he touches me I end up in the ER with third degree burns...life isn't fair *pouts*

z0mie(at)yahoo(dot)com

Vivien said...

That dark and mysterious hottie in the corner. He whisked me away. Showed me his pleasures. He's all I've ever wanted. Too bad he tricked me with those wretched pomegranate seeds.

It is might hot down here.

deadtossedwaves at gmail dot com

Anonymous said...

Met a wizard for the first time...More like Voldemort than Harry
sheuschkel@hotmail.com

Tiffany said...

Ok so I also thin this is really fun and got a little carried with them I hope you don't mind.

I bought this cute little kitten the other day. When I got home I took a shower and when I got out there was some creepy guy sitting there.I screamed and started hitting him. He then turned into a bird and flew away. I still don't know where Mr. Cuddles went. If you have seen him please call.

Ok I met this fallen angel the other day turns out he really fell and is in the hospital.It might be a while for him to recover. I dont think he'll ever be the same.

Sooo I met the guy of my dreams. Tall, blue eyes, and shaggy black hair. He finally told me that he was a werewolf. I always wonder why he always stayed inside turns out he likes to chase cars.

I met this real hot werewolf and we just got together. The next day he dumped me for a German Shepherd. WTH

Kayla Anne said...

I stopped regarding the power of invading other people's dreams when I realized how many...personal thoughts invaded people's sleeping minds. I mean, I always used to think that the first time I made out with somebody I would actually be ME.

angelsandskating08@gmail.com

Renae McKenzie said...

Found out I'mm a witch. The magic is awesome! What's not so awesome? Demons trying to kill you in you're sleep - faces like that are not a nice wakeup call.

Christina said...

Having a pegasus sounds awesome, but it's not half so wonderful as you'd think when they're the size of chicken wings and twice as flimsy.

Silverpool said...

So I went to a graveyard last night. The Good: I found a ghost! The Bad: It bleeping possessed me! So now I have interesting cravings for Peeps and Chinese Food. Guess being possessed isn't as exciting as the movies make it out to be. :/

Ruby97 said...

When i arrived home last night, i was pleasently suprised to find a fairy godmother making a sandwich in my kitchen. Sadly, it was an evil fairy godmother and threw her peanut butter sandwich at my face. I am allergic to peanuts, so you can imagine why i was disappointed.

roxy_rules(at)live(dot)com

purplg8r said...

I finally met Whisper, the Unicorn who I used to have a picture of on my dress when I was four. She was beautiful with purple and pink hair. But sadly, the rumors are true. Unicorns really are evil.

Ryan Snyder said...

um. i got a little over excited as well. this is really fun. so... here it is. i don't know if they are funny. but..yeah


finally met the man of my dreams last night. And guess what? He told me he was a shape shifter. i got so excited, and lets admit,a little bit turned on. i asked him to turn into a wolf and he gave me a face. so i tried again: tiger? no. komodo? no. Dragon? no. griffin? no. alligator? no. i finally got angry after he shot down every exciting animal i could name. i asked him what he could turn into. the man then proceded to turn into a kitten. that is so not sexy. D:


met and fell in love with an alien yesterday. oh man, those green eyes! our relationship had been off to a great start, but i am a little bit reluctant to become physical with him. i mean.... when he starts talking dirty to me....he keeps mentioning the word "probe". D:

met an elf on an internet dating site last week. after seven wonderful days of exchanging love letters, i think I've found the one!! we agree to meet. in my mind i am picturing Orlando Bloom from Lord of the Rings. what walks through the doors of the coffee shop. however, is more like Will Ferrell from Elf. um..maybe we aren't soul mates after all. you think i can sneak out the back?!

.Ambur. said...

Awesome contest...so fun! :D I think I'd love your kid's parties...just saying. ;D haha

Okay, so I tweeted that:
"Romantic dinners with vampire boyfriends never go as planned-you end up eating alone; he ends up in hives from his garlic allergy #Endlessly"
Tweet link: https://twitter.com/AmburHostyn/status/205890736191848448

Also...if I actually sacrifice a calculator will it help? Or will that be yet another supernatural thing that disappoints me?? :P

Thanks for the chance to win an ARC of Endlessly...I seriously CANNOT wait to read it! :D

Ambur :D
ambiepie_6(at)hotmail(dot)com

Beczy said...

YAY! Awesome contest time! Now, my entry. *clears throat*

I always thought meeting a selkie in human form would involve falling in love at first sight, because who can resist chiseled muscles that rival a Greek god's? I did get the muscles, wet and gleaming in the sun. But I didn't count on the long whiskers. Or the pointed face and protruding buck teeth. Or the fishy stench.

Yeah, turns out selkies are more attached to their seal form than I thought.

mil said...

After 12 hours of chasing the leprechaun, I finally caught it. There I stood dreaming of riches and as was required of it, it gave me its pot of gold and ran away smirking and that's when I saw the pot of gold was nothing more than empty golden coin chocolate wrappers.

I was obviously devastated and in the middle of nowhere at 2 am in the morning with nothing but a pot, some wrappers and the clothes on my back, What's a guy to do?

Thanks for the giveaway,
milind.uppal@gmail.com

Ellen Faith said...

Dating a guy who can control fire isn't all that hot. Not when he burns your favourite top off in chemistry.

Thanks for the giveaway! Love this contest.

ellen.masquerade@gmail.com

Krystal Larson said...

I thought it would be awesome to have a mermaid as a best friend...until I discovered all she cares about are the scales when we go on double-dates. edysicecreamlover18@gmailDOTcom

Kemendraugh said...

The problem with elves is not that they're less noble, high-born, and mysterious as I'd hoped. No, the problem with elves is that they're costing me a fortune in hair product.

kemendraugh at gmail dot com

LauraN said...

I found a magic spell that opened a door into the secret world of the Elvi. Unfortunately, once I went through, I was surrounded by middle aged men in white sequined jumpsuits with black pompadours all urging me to "love them tender." Oh well.

Rebekkah Ford said...

I was in the woods the other day when I heard a beautiful melody-soft and breathy-echoing around me. I paused to listen and that's when I ran into Pan.
You know, the Greek god of the wild.
He looked like a guy (a cute guy) with a muscular upper body, except for he had the hindquarters, legs, and horns of a goat.
He stopped playing his flute when he saw me and smiled. We became fast friends. But now, a week later, he's turned into a leg puppy-a guy that latches onto you like a puppy, trying to hump your leg.
I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose our friendship because of this, but he's annoying the crap out of me.

Jordan McCollum said...

I married the werewolf of my dreams—but the prenup didn't mention I'd be shaving his back.

Yack.

Beautiful, More So Expressions said...

I have two:

"Kind of excited when my boyfriend said he was a centaur until I realized he just meant he was a horse's bum."

And the second (not exactly supernatural option):

"My boyfriend got bit by a radioactive spider and now he's super clingy. So much for personal space."

Shannon - Expressyourselfbmse(at)gmail(dot)com

~Courtney said...

Finally met a merman while swimming in the ocean. He seemed great until I noticed he was half squid instead of fish. The slimy tentacles made me end the conversation quickly. Maybe I will try a different ocean...

variousaltitudes said...

I recently found out I’m a changeling. It turns out my parents are trolls – they live under a bridge. I’ve never felt better to have an accountant for a father.

humdinger_of_aday@hotmail.co.uk

Emilie Sofie Johannesen said...

I posted this on twitter :)

So I finally got my flying bison in the mail. I placed him in the garden, jumped on his back and said, ”Yip yip” loudly and nothing happened. Turns out every bison has it’s own password. Mine’s remain unknown, and right now he’s busy eating up my well taken care of avocado tree. So much for Amazon..

Emilie

EmilieSofieJohannesen@hotmail.com

PS! I love your competitions! Always fun and creative :)
PS PS I also LOVE LOVE LOVE your books :) Can't wait for newest! :)

YAlover said...

Met a boy today who said he could change shapes. However, those shapes include only worm and bird. Not really romantic.

Thanks! I love your contests!!
Here's my email, in the off chance i should win: eglawrence@windstream.net

Victoria said...

Met my dragon but when he shifts it's like being in "the Littles." He's all miniature in ALL aspects except the fire breathing :(. He got excited and let's just say the fire department showed up.

vsloboda(at)gmail(dot)com

Ana said...

After months and months of begging and way too early newspaper delivering, finally got my very own dragon! Except instead of the grand, majestic beast I see in movies, Nogard (my dragon) acts like Clifford the Big Red Dog with sharper claws and teeth.

*sigh*

Thanks for the giveaway!!
~bluestar22yl@gmail.com

Angie said...

I finally stole those flying monkeys from the Wizard of Oz. Unfortunately, they are very selective on the soap used to wash their wings.

Thank you for this giveaway!! I cannot wait to read endlessly.

ajiehuang1997 (at) gmail (dot) com

Ravens said...

My grandson really wanted a dragon for his birthday last month, so I got him a little one at Monsters 'R Us. Turns out they grow really fast - his dad is pretty angry with me.

I like this idea. I will do a story for my grandson I think - Noah and the Dragon.

Jenna Cooper said...

I finally fell for my very own paranormal creature--a fairy! But then I found out that fairies are actually plants. It's really awkward kissing and then finding pollen all over me. Others in paranormal relationships are inter-species couples. I'm part of an inter-kingdom couple.

jennalizis[at]gmail[dot]com

Zakiya said...

So, yeah. Ponies are great, but I've always wanted a unicorn. Then it turns out that they're tiny. Not nearly big enough to ride on. Not only that, but their horns aren't really horns. They're giant growths. They have bad tempers and smell funky (and not in a good way!) But the worst thing by FAR is that they're not magical AT ALL and HAVE NO RAINBOWS! so disappointing. ;_;

katie rorbach said...

Finally found the love of my life, but he's a shape shifter. Why do boys think its funny to turn into the most scarey things in the world, at night, or people you cant stand. He best just wait, time of the month, see what i can turn into...

katie3711@hotmail.com

Cant not WAIT for ENDLESSLY!!!!!!

Gwen Gardner said...

Finally found the guy of my dreams. No, seriously. He only appears in my dreams. Which was awesome...I mean, until I woke up one morning and the dude was standing next to my bed, all transparent and untouchable. Ghosts are like that.
Thanks Kristen - it was a fun exercise!
ladygwen@centurylink.net

Crystal B. said...

I finally found a dragon like I have been looking for! Too bad when I went to ride it, the scales cut me up so badly I had to spend weeks in the hospital in recovery. Not doing that again.

hpfchamber(at)yahoo(dot)com

Karen Akins said...

Kraken? Try crackpot.

Anonymous said...

Edward finally dumped Bella for me, but every time we go out in the sun, he always blinds me! So, for my birthday, instead of getting me diamond earings, he got me a pair of sunglasses!
-Elena Lucas

Nikelle said...

My dreams came true today when I found myself face-to-face with a unicorn! Unfortunately, my taming methods resulted in a face-to-hoof situation. They seem like all fun and rainbows until the rainbows are on your face :P

Sheepa said...

Finally got a direwolf for my birthday, someone should have warned me that sleeping next to a fully grown direwolf meant that it gets the bed and I get the floor.

Jessica said...

Met a shape-shifter. Turns out, he can only do lamps. Lame

cannibalducks@gmail.com

warmingHam said...

I met the man of my dreams last night, to bad it was during a nightmare.

SO excited for Endlessly!!!

vanessa.warmingham@gmail.com

leafpool61 said...

I finally got my pet dragon after waiting for 5 months. As it turns out, it was the size of my thumb and didn't even breath fire. Oh, and it was plastic. :P I was very disappointed.

sanyag said...

Upside of dating a Merman, you have the perfect excuse to kiss, you need the oxygen under water! the downside, you get all pruny, and seriously, no one looks all that good wet......

Ashley said...

My sister turned out to be a changeling, so while shes out saving the fae world, I get to be an only child! Huzzzaaaah for more Christmas presents!

momma4teacher said...

I finally found the man of my dreams. Unfortunately, he only exists in print and I can only be with him when I read. On top of that, he's already cheating on me! UGH!

Allison said...

I finally got to meet a dragon - he asked if I could get a refill for his inhaler. Freakin' dragon asthma.

allison.dayle@gmail.com

Athena Franco said...

That awkward moment when the unicorn you've made friends with finds out you're not a virgin.

Alysa said...

Met an old hag in the forest and helped her carry her bundle until we had to part ways. She said thanks and that was that.

Hayley said...

Dating a werewolf isn't all it's cracked up to be, when he sheds his fur gets on my black clothes.

Thanks for the giveaway! :)
hayley.weller85@hotmail.com

Jill Kaplan said...

I brought my wand to my spell casting class, and everyone stated laughing. The professor explained that we didn’t use wands and cursed JK Rowling for corrupting the youth. Stupid school of magyck. Don’t you know the rules?!
And just for kicks, I did a second!
I met a chimera but instead of giving me wish tokens, I got these fabulous burn marks that perfectly match my skin tone. And all my aloe was stolen by flying monkeys with disgusting breath! Perfect.

booboo said...

Finally got to go over to a witches house. I was uberexcited until I found out there were no couldrens, broom sticks, or potions. Not even a BLEEPING black cat! ugh...

Below are links to pics were i wrote it on my hand... and on my foot!
http://booboosfavbooks.blogspot.com/

JH said...

Met a guy who said he was a Frog Prince...turns out he was just really slimy.

C. Issy said...

My worst boyfriend ever was a ghost. Seriously bad sense of humor-- I mean, he rattled chains outside of my bedroom window ALL NIGHT LONG. Not romantic at all.

Robin Weeks said...

So, it turns out that fallen angels are kicked out of heaven for a reason. #whoknew?

Courtney Barr - The Southern Princess said...

Soooo today has been pretty interesting. I mean, it has been a really crappy day. First I forgot to shampoo my hair in the shower = greasy blonde mess; then I failed to shave my left leg = one legged pants are NEVER in fashion (no matter what your skeevy little brother tells you - the laughter will ring in my ears for decades!); last but not least I almost crashed my mom's car into the hardware store downtown because this HOT green eyed guy was standing on top of the Dairy Bar. Yeah ON TOP!
Well he was up there until he slowed down the car before impact...yeah he flew or something - pretty cool, found out he's like uber strong, magical, save the world kind of guy.
Of course I was psyched, thrilled and embarrassed...then he breathed on me. Really, really, REALLY bad halitosis...really bad. Hot eyes though.

Oh and the shiny glitter handprint left on the hood....yeah, my dad will never be seen in this car again.

clsbarr(at)yahoo(dot)com

WulfLuva said...

Ever since I saw Jacob Black I wanted a werewolf boyfriend more than anything. When I finally found one I was ecstatic. Too bad his hair keeps clogging up my shower drain. Eww... Groom much?

Nicole Zoltack said...

Dated a zombie once. Could not get over how bad he smelled. Rotting flesh - major turn off.

the Lola Letters said...

In 2010, I gave birth to what I thought was theeee cutest little baby. Everything seemed to be perfect.

But around age one, he started growling and slapping people. Then he refused to eat anything other than corn dogs and fruit snacks.

Now, at 20 months, he toddles all over the house grunting and barking orders in some strange language that can only be described as a hybrid of Finnish and Tasmanian Devil.

We've come to the conclusion that he is part gremlin. {And NOT the fuzzy, cute, Gizmo kind so much as the "I ate 3 day old pizza after midnight and popped weird little demon spawns up out of my back" kind. }

Bummer.
Renesme ain't got nothin' on him!

Myrna Foster said...

Finally lured a brownie into helping with the housework, and now I can't find ANYTHING.

Small Town Shelly Brown said...

As the daughter of a merman let me tell you that norwhals ate the last unicorn (and it tasted like horse, with a smidgen of rainbow... at least that's what they told me)
(Totally posted that on my FB and expect some serious head shaking to ensue)

Marymoose said...

I saved a mermaid while on vacation, no she did NOT give me any wishe's, introduce me to any hot mermen OR give me the ability to talk to sea creatures. She DID however try to freaking DROWN me! thats the last time I ever help a fish.

Katie said...

Finally got turned into a vampire. Apparently I'm allergic to blood.

Erin said...

I fell in love with a ghost a few years back. Handsome, kind, all of that.
Jerk waited three months to tell me he was engaged to the monster under my bed. I knew that thing was real!

(Email address: 18erins@gmail.com)

Gabrielle said...

So, met the coolest and hottest werewolf ever... but he's so busy going after my poodle that he hasn't noticed me yet.

Taylor (The Great ☺) said...

Became a Vampire, turns out my power is becoming so white... I GLOW... not so helpful when trying to sneak up on a deer...

SweetTart_Girl said...

I finally meant the Faery man of my dreams. I was so ready for some witty conversations and a riddle every other sentence. Then he went a showed me a rainbow, and went on and on about his flower garden and all the little animals. Turns out, he was a Disney fairy.

Jessica @ Books: A true story said...

Fun contest!
I can just see Harry Potter getting ready to save the world on a dragon but it turns out they're the size of iguanas.

Jessica B
booksatruestory at gmail.com

Rachel Castrro said...

In a dark street full of muggers, a man approaches me and tells me he's a shapeshifter willing to take me home. He flies he says, like a giant eagle or something --turns out his other form is that of Big Bird from Sesame Street.

rachelam.castro@gmail.com

Jen Starkey said...

I was totally excited when I learned that my freaking hot, new boyfriend is really a werewolf! That is, until I saw how MUCH he sheds, has fleas, and still is not housebroken...so much for meeting the folks!

Jen S.

starkeystars@yahoo.com

Jen Starkey said...

I was totally excited when I learned that my freaking hot, new boyfriend is really a werewolf! That is until I saw how much he sheds, has fleas, and still is not housebroken...so much for meeting the folks!

Jen S.

starkeystars@yahoo.com

An said...

Would be fun to hang with werewolves but I like my clothes free of fur and they shed too much.

dream.facade@yahoo.com

Kaylynn Johnsen said...

Dating a centaur isn't all rides on the beach. Yeah, great kisser but, the petting...

Jen R. said...

I finally got my own genie! But sadly, old age has ruined his hearing, so when I wished for my very own Lend, he gave me a freakin' pen. ;)

Morrigan Aoife said...

What an interesting idea. Lots of good responses. Here is mine....

When I turned eighteen I traveled to the Scottish Highlands to attend magic school. I wasn’t there more than a day before I met Druesilla. I thought having a Cait Sith for a friend would be really cool, but it turns out she’s a real witch.