Friday, August 26, 2011

Friends

I can't be your friend.

I'm sorry.

I wish I could be friends with everyone that wants to be friends with me. I wish I could email you back and forth, wish we could have inside jokes, wish I could respond to every comment here, and on twitter, and on facebook, and every other way to contact me.

I wish I could read all of your blogs, and comment, and know what is going on in your lives.

I wish I could help every aspiring author who wants my help, give them personalized advice, do what I could to comfort and inspire and help along.

But frankly? There are a lot of you. And there is one of me. And outside of the internet I have this whole life thing, with a husband and kids and friends and happiness and heartache. There is an entire world you are not part of or privy to. Because in the end, I don't know you, and you don't know me.

That's okay.

I'm sorry that we don't know each other, and I'm sorry that I don't have the time or energy (emotionally and physically) to build more relationships. I hope this blog is enough. I hope you enjoy it, and that it makes you smile. I wish I could do more. But I hope you understand why I (and so many other authors) can't. I hope you view our shortcomings with compassion and kindness. I hope you don't take offense where offense is never, ever intended. We're doing the best we can. Some of us are more accessible than others. But we all try to give back in the ways that we can, and we all appreciate the reading and writing community in ways you'll never know.

So, I lied. I can be your friend. I am. You're mine, too. It's just a weird kind of friendship, but we're okay with that, right? Weird is wonderful.

33 comments:

Michelle Davidson Argyle said...

Well-said, Kiersten. :)

Mundie Moms said...

Well said! And yes, weird is wonderful :)

Tina Moss said...

It's perfectly okay to be weird. And I think through your blog and various social media forums, you're very accessible to fans, readers and writers. So, don't stress. :)

ladonna watkins said...

Great post. Wierd is good.

Angela Felsted said...

Well, you know, since I have nowhere near as many followers as you and can't even keep up with my own, I totally get where you're coming from here.

J.A. Souders said...

Well said! And weird is wonderful.

Richard said...

There's a downside to social media. I have 29 followers and I can barely keep up. I wouldn't even attempt to keep up with over 2,000. I think most people understand the impossibility of doing so. You'd never be able to find time to sleep, much less do anything else.

DforDarla said...

Well said.

Richard said...

Thank you for all the helpful information you share with other writers! You do enough and share enough and that's enough! Thank you!

Addison Gast said...

S'OK Kiersten--as has been said "Its the thought that counts" Something tells me that you are a very good Mom and wonderful wife.....Texas Ladies are like that

Patricia Lynne said...

It's okay, just look at is as the type of friends who don't always get to chit chat as much as they'd like. This post really made me smile. =)

Megs said...

:)

Anthony said...

I like cheese.

Lexie said...

We all understand. It'd be impossible to keep up with all your fans and followers. :) Our weird friendship is fine.

lora96 said...

Cool.

Love your blog. I'm actually fairly impressed with your heavy blogging schedule considering you do have family and writing commitments!

Mel Fowler said...

yes weird is wonderful.

normal is boring :)

Sarah said...

A good problem to have - too many people wanting to be your friend. One day I will have that, too.

Steph Sinkhorn said...

I'm always cool with reading your blog and enjoying your silly tweets. You just keep on keepin' on ;)

Tameka said...

I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone that isn't weird! Very well said.

Suz Korb said...

Yeah sure, no prob. You're not my friend either, but you are. lol ;)

Suz Korb said...

lol @ Anthony. I like cheese too! :D

Jennifer E. McFadden said...

Well said!

Jess said...

I'm pretty sure that your weirdness is exactly the reason why we all like you. :)

Kate said...

I think all you do is simply great Kiersten! Don't stress that you aren't doing enough, because you're doing more than. I just feel bad that you felt you had to apologize, there's really no need. Thanks for all you do, books, blog, etc. And yes, your blog always makes me smile. :)

erica and christy said...

My best friend in the world is someone I've met in person once. (she's the christy in erica and christy. I'm erica. ha) So, yes, friends can be made on the internet.

My favorite author story is from when I was in 5th grade (which was, alas, in 1985). I wrote a very heartfelt fangirl letter to the author of my favorite Trixie Belden book (before I knew anything about ghostwriters), telling her how much I loved her and how Trixie changed my life (yes, I was a bit melodramatic then).

"She" sent me a list of books I could buy from the same publisher. I was heartbroken for months.

That's the long way of saying - author blogs are good. :)
erica

Samantha Jean said...

We understand! While I read this, STAN by Eminem and SUPERMAN by Five for Fighting were competing for airtime in my head. Fans can sometimes get out of control. You are only human after all. (Even if a super one at that!) I think it's wonderful that you're on the web as much as you are. Love reading your blog posts and status updates on Facebook. Thanks for all you do!

Andrea said...

It's okay Kiersten! You have zillions of fans and we understand you can't form relationships with all of us. You're doing a great job -- don't be too hard on yourself. Besides, according to Dunbar's number, you max out somewhere between 100 -- 230 relationships (usually said to be 150). Relax...you'll always have a few people saying you're not doing enough...listen to the majority of us who think you already go above and beyond.

Allie Sanders said...

I appreciate the effort put in by all authors to be online, to write blogs, to tweet and FB and let us in on their lives from the other side. I especiall appreciate the effort of authors like yourself who actually reply to tweets, who interact when they have the time between their real lives and, I don't know, WRITING THE BOOKS WE LOVE!

Anonymous said...

Your blog and your books are more than enough! No worries. :)

-Christine from Arizona

Cat Jensen said...

Weird really is wonderful. Normal is so overrated ;-)

We're strangers who are also friends. Which makes us strange friends.

Makes sense, no?

Hayden said...

Your redesign is beautiful!

.Ambur. said...

If a relationship isn't weird...is it really worth it? Nope, it isn't. :P I love that you take the time to write blog posts. :) It's like we get to know you through them, and I love it. Thanks for sharing Kiersten, and I love your new blog design, it's very pretty. :D

Nathary said...

You're so honest, unlike any other writers I've seen, you take time to tell us. And we understand you. After all, paranormal author is human too. :D