In case you never get a chance to see me speak in person, I thought I'd give you a little glimpse into what it looks like. Basically, my hands are OUT OF CONTROL. People always comment on how I talk really fast, or say things like, "Sorry guys, sparkle tangent..." But what they don't tell you (because it is so scary they have blocked it from their memories) is that my hands turn into creatures with minds of their own and creep and shimmy and flail while I talk.
Sometimes the gestures make sense. For example, in the following picture I am probably saying, "I know, you guys thought I would be this big, didn't you? Not quite!"
Actually I was talking about my first literary crush, Martin the Warrior. Who happened to be a mouse. Don't judge, he was totally hot.
In this next picture I am pretty sure my hands had completely taken over and I was actually asleep while my hands made threatening, scary gestures at the audience. These I can only interpret as, "YES, WE WILL LEAD THE ZOMBIE REVOLUTION. JOIN US OR DIE. ACTUALLY JOIN US AND DIE."
I have no idea what on earth I was really talking about that could have justified this hand gesture. And my dad said of the forty pictures he took, my eyes were closed in thirty-eight of them. It's a talent of mine, really.
Fortunately I'm short enough that many of my hand spasms are hidden behind the podium, but those wily little rascals always try to find new ways to pop up. In fact, while I wasn't looking (because I was too busy answering a question about whether or not Lend would be in the sequel [answer: no, because I didn't want any flirting or kissing and Supernaturally focuses entirely on Evie doing homework and studying for the SATs]) my hands actually snapped my favorite pen in half. "THAT'S WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU TRY TO CONTAIN US, KIERSTEN," they said. Well, I mean, more or less, since they don't actually have mouths.
"Yet. You mean we don't have mouths...yet."
Still, you work with what you've got, right? Which is why if you ever do get to see me in person, I'll have my nails painted a funky color. If my hands are going to take over, they might as well take over in style.
(And for the record, many wonderful people showed up both for my speech and my signing. It was awesome, and I was super happy to meet them. Not as happy as my hands, but then again, those things are caffeinated even when I'm not.)
(Speaking of hands, thanks for letting me put a ring on yours nine years ago, Hot Stuff. So glad yours are the hands my weirdo hands get to hold for the rest of our lives.)