Wednesday, March 30, 2011

To My Agent On Her Birthday

Once upon a mid-day dreary, While I drafted, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious never-printed tome
While I despaired, sorrow bringing, suddenly there came a ringing
Of some joker now a-calling, calling by my chamber phone.
“Tis telemarketers,” I muttered, “being obnoxious at my phone.
Never leaving me alone.”

Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak November,
And each separate query dying wrought its pain a little more.
Eagerly I wished for glory, though the stats were getting gory,
no one wanted my poor stories, stories that I longed to tell.
Stories I would never tell, unpublished for evermore.

Deep into that abyss peering, moving on my soul was fearing,
Doubting, hating that my dreams were simply dreams and nothing more.
But through the silence still that ringing, telephone its siren singing,
No more hope the sound was bringing, just a survey that would bore.
Telemarketers and nothing more.

So I answered, nothing hoping, with failure I now was coping,
“Stranger!” thought I, “Do your worst! I’ve no money, I’m accursed.
You can ask and ask and ask; I’ve no money, I will burst.”
But ‘though madness I was living, a good impression I’d be giving,
So I answered, answered in my nicest voice, “Hello?”

Quoth my agent, “Hey Kiersten, it’s Michelle Wolfson.”
“Angel!” said I, “Miracle! Angel from the heav’ns above,
Well, New York, but angel still! My heart will burst with joy and love!
Tell this soul with grief so weighted, tell me now will I be sated?
Will my dreaming, dreaming, dreaming, turn now into something more?”
Quoth my agent, “Do you always answer the phone this way?”

“Silence!” said I, heartbeat racing, “Is this the end that I am facing?
Am I to work with you forever, work with you forevermore?
On this journey, long begun, that until now was no fun,
Will I have a genius partner, will you be my own, my one?”
Quoth my agent, “I’ll send you a copy of the contract.”

And my agent, never failing, still is working, still is selling
Selling selling selling all my pretty words around.
I can write now, never fearing, encouragement forever hearing,
Knowing she’s my agent still, and despair I never will.
Back to my work I am turning, all my soul within me burning,
Burning with the love I have for Agent Michelle like before.
The best agent, forevermore.


Heather Hellmann said...

That's so sweet. Happy birthday Michelle Wolfson!

Elise said...

That is fantastic! I love your writing even MORE now! Happy birthday Michelle Wolfson and thank you for being the wonder agent!

Gennifer Albin said...

Poe would be proud!

Juliemybird said...

Oh, this made my night. "Quoth my agent." Love it. I'll echo Gennifer. Poe would be proud.

Kiersten said...

Awesome. Happy Birthday, Michelle.

Deborah Claire said...

All I can say is "WOW!" Your agent is very fortunate.

Broken Angel said...

Wow! Your agent's very lucky to have such a funny and considerate author like you :) > w < Cute poem~

Michelle Wolfson said...

I think this is one of the best birthday presents I've ever gotten. The first reading made me laugh. The second read made me cry. I'm so lucky to have you as my client and my friend. Unquoth.

Thank you so very much.

nkrell said...

This was brilliant!

Jeigh said...

Lovely. Happy birthday, Michelle!

Shain Brown said...

Nicely executed. Happy Birthday Michelle!

Suzie F. said...

So excellent.

(And what an awesome coincidence that I just read The Raven with my daughter last night because she's studying it in school - I can't wait to show her your version tomorrow morning)

Happy, happy birthday, Michelle!

Myrna Foster said...

I love this. What a great birthday tribute.

"Do you always answer the phone this way?" lol

Athena said...

Happy birthday Michelle!!! :)

Eli said...

I LOVED this! Awesome birthday treat! x)

Wes said...

Well played!

heidi said...

You are so bleeping cute, Kiersten.

Lisa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Suzi McGowen said...

I loved this! Especially the "Do you always answer the phone this way" line :)

LinWash said...

You. Are. Awesome.

lora96 said...

You rock. Brilliant.

Holly (Between the Bookshelf) said...

You never seize to amuse us all :) I always love reading your post! Now I'm wanting to read Poe again.

Happy Birthday, Michelle Wolfson!

Claire Dawn said...

Aw! How sweet :) Happy Birthday, Michelle!

Sheepa/PegasusZ said...

That was such a BEAUTIFUL poem!! :)

Madeleine said...

I can't believe I'm late to this! Brilliant post, Kiersten!


Whirlochre said...

Belated birthday greetings to Michelle...