Friday, October 15, 2010

Farwell, Hot Stuff

Goodbye me! Until next time.  Kiersten will be back on Monday.

I'll work on getting the zombie shirts into the mainstream. You never know, those old T&C Surf T-shirts were pretty wacky. . .

I'm going to get back to my real life now.  Activities like bugging Kiersten to tell me her plotlines, and suggesting she kills more main characters.  Those are the scenes that are really memorable.  Who could forget when Gatsby ran over Marilla Cuthbert?

In closing, I'll dispense some writing advice.
1.  Never edit or revise.  It shows a lack of confidence in your writing.
2.  Don't use spellcheck; it takes away from the naturalness of the language.
3.  Try to completely change plotlines and/or characters halfway through the book to throw the reader off.
4.  Try to use stock characters like in movies--the tough-talking New Yorker, the Southern Gentlemen.  Using the same characters is a great method.
5.  If you run out of things to say, just use dialog from Charles Dickens, because it's in the public domain.  If you're not famous, no one's going to sue you, but if you are famous, you'll get sued no matter what.

And that's it for Hot Stuff.  In fact, blogging was such a strain this post was actually dictated by Hot Stuff to Kiersten after blogger ate the whole thing.  Turns out blogging isn't for the faint of heart.

Fortunately, Hot Stuff?  Is hot.  So he can pretty much do whatever he wants.

He didn't dictate that last part.

But he should have.

16 comments:

fairyhedgehog said...

Brilliant advice! I'll soon be published now.

Tawna Fenske said...

I will commit every single one of these writing tips to memory. Thank you for helping to advance my writing career.

Tawna

Debra L. Schubert said...

I love the parts about not editing and changing plot lines halfway through. No wonder Kiersten is doing so well. Her other/better half is a GENIUS!!!!

Natalie Whipple said...

Actually, I forgot Gatsby ran over anyone...I blocked the whole book from my mind so I don't even know if that's the truth or not.

So I'm gonna argue that sometimes death is not memorable.

Leigh said...

Ha ha! Fantastic stuff. You're a breath of fresh air.
You should pop in again some time.
Leigh

lotusgirl said...

It was fun having you play along. Sorry blogger showed its evil self while you were here.

Anita Saxena said...

This is excellent advice!!! Loved your posts this week.

Marsha Sigman said...

You are the smartiest person I know now. I am going to use all of your advice. I am sure to be published soon.

lora96 said...

PS You are so wrong about that scene. Holden Caulfield ran over Marilla Cuthbert. on his vespa.

Jessie Oliveros said...

Ha! I've enjoyed your husband's posts this week, Kiersten!

BURIED IN BOOKS said...

I'm sure it's been said before somewhere, but thanks for not listening to hot stuff and killing off Evie. How could you have sequels without her??? My 13 yr old son says, "I don't like all that fantasy stuff." I told him, "Sam, they guy is made of water." He thinks for a minute and says, "Cool." Don't know if he'll read it yet but I'm trying. I wrote in my review that "Evie has to be one of the most likeable characters in the world of paranormals that I've ever met". She really is. I can't wait for the next book and tell Hot Stuff that that's his bread and butter he may never have to work again!

Heather
Buried in Books and
has not forgiven Hot Stuff

Ishta Mercurio said...

HA-HAHAHA! This was a great post. (Yeah, Blogger has eaten my posts before, too. It sucks when that happens.)

Thanks for the week of great posts, Hot Stuff!

Abby Minard said...

Haven't experienced the eaten-post thing, but that would totally suck. Great blogging this past week!

Whirlochre said...

It's like tapping into the mind of a celestial sage.

Catura said...

"Farwell"? Noah's advice put to action!

Claire Dawn said...

Love the advice. lol.